All I Really Want For Christmas
"All I Really Want For Christmas" was a song sung by the Griffin family. Although it was not originally in any Family Guy episode, it was included in Road to the North Polehttp://twitter.com/teenagesleuth. It was originally found on a now-defunct web site honoring Seth MacFarlane. Listen Lyrics Peter: Hi, I'm Peter Griffin. All of us here at Family Guy would like to wish you a Merry Christmas, or a Happy Jew Christmas, depending on your religion. Lois: Peter, it's Hanukkah. Peter: Oh, sorry. Chris: laughs. Meg: Shut up, Chris! This is supposed to be serious! Chris: Okay, we've prepared a musical holiday greeting, that we would like to sing for you. Lois: Brian, would you start us off? Brian: Sure. Stewie: You know, I heard we can say dirty words on this album. Chris: Boobie! Ha ha, I said boobie. Did you hear me? Ha, I said it twice. Brian: Okay, okay, take it easy, you guys throat Ladies and gentlemen, The lush arrangements of Walter Murphy. The snow is glistening in the trees , as Christmas carols fill the breeze, and children pray on bended knees... Stewie: Santa Claus, be sure you don't screw up my freakin' order, please! Brian: Great, thanks for destroying the mood. Chris: Dad, what do you want for Christmas? Peter: Ah, let's see Britney Spears and Courtney Cox wearing nothing, but their socks, is all I really want for Christmas this year! Brian: Well, that's just not practical. Peter: Plenty of beer and so much scotch, that I hit on my own crotch, is all I really want for Christmas this year! How about you Lois, what do you want? Lois: All my flabbin' cellulite surgically uprooted, then installed in Julia Robert's ass, Ha! Spending a steamy night between Kevin and his partner Bean... giggling as they remove my brassiere Peter & Lois: All these happy wishes And lots of Christmas cheer Is all I really want this year Lois: What do you want Meg? Stewie: How about something to remove her Matt Houston moustache. Meg: I want a house in Malibu... and a cure for bacne, too. That's all I really want for Christmas this year! Chris: Eww! You have bacne! Meg: Shut up, Chris! Peter: Anything else, honey? Meg: I want a singing navel, Dad, just like on that Levi's ad. That's all I really want for Christmas this year! Brian: All I can say is, thank God that advertising firm doesn't do tampons. Chris: Now me! There's an evil monkey, who's living in my closet, I just wish he'd go away and die, I want Jillian Barberie, rubbing up real close to me saying dirty, bad things into my ear. Stewie: Oh, she's atrocious. Chris: All these happy wishes and lots of Christmas cheer...is all I really want this year! Stewie: Well, it's your turn, dog. As if anyone gives a two-schilling shit about what you want Brian: Every year I've prayed and prayed for a girl who isn't spayed.. that's all I really want for Christmas this year! Chris: What does spayed mean? Peter: Oh, you know, like Melissa Etheridge. Brian: I'd love it if you would not harass me.. when I start to chew my ass.. That's all I really want for Christmas this year! You're turn, kid. Stewie: Is it awfully much to have, just one evening weekly , where there is no cover charge at Rage. Brian: I knew it! Stewie: Knew what? Lois's name I'd love to see... with the letters R.I.P. She's alive and well, but let's play by ear. All: All these happy wishes and lots of Christmas cheer... is all I really want this year! Stewie: Oh, dear. That high note rather did me in. Would somebody please change me? Category:Musical Number(s) (deleted) Category:Musical Numbers